Posted by: jt | July 20, 2010

yo, shut the fuck up

So. Fucking. Unhappy lately.

Lately, I’ve been seriously contemplating the possibility of just quitting my job and moving in with my parents and…the more I think about it, the more that’s what I want to do, even though I know full well what a bad idea it is.

That’s a much longer post, but it’s the strongest possible indicator of my current mental state, which is fragile, at best.

LIST.

I think I’m going to start requiring myself to make them multiple times a day, because I’m NOT doing well and they HELP.

LIST.

  1. I am grateful for co-workers (who report to me!) who love me and I love them. Seriously, there is actual love.
  2. I am grateful for an abundance of people who honestly care about me and only want what’s best for me.
  3. I am grateful for sunshine. Even if there isn’t very much of it, there’s more. Progress. Some.
  4. I am grateful that I know, if I get to the point where I just can’t be here any more, I know my mom will choose my needs over my dad’s wants, i.e. I can go there until I figure out what’s next.
  5. I am grateful that, even though I forgot my wallet today, I could get much-needed food with the gift card my intern had given me.
  6. I am grateful for my deep, unshakable belief that things work out. Even if it’s really fucking dark right now.
  7. I am grateful that I always, always exceed my personally-mandated requirement of 5 things on this list without trying.
  8. And I’m grateful for Auto-Tune the News, because it’s just damn funny.
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Responses

  1. It’s good to identify things that help and do them! Even the littlest things! Yay for good things that help.

    Your post title reminds me of some advice my acupuncturist gave me today re: my work situation: “fuck that shit.”

  2. :-) I have many, many fond memories of this song…including diving to turn the volume down on the speakers when my prudish ex-boss would come into my office at inopportune moments.

  3. This is a song? I am not familiar!

  4. *gasp*

    We need to acquaint you with Cake’s “Fashion Nugget” album. This is from the song “Nugget,” which is one of the most cathartic songs I know.

  5. The funny thing is I know several of the songs from that album but I don’t think I’ve ever actually listened to the entire album.

  6. Ah, okay. That’s better than nothing. :-)

    That album, along with whitechocolatespaceegg evoke 2005/2006 vividly for me. Not all bad…and not all good!


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