Posted by: jt | October 5, 2009

so i knock on the door

A couple of months ago I wrote about my restless nature – how I felt like I was killing time and was ready for change.

Change comes.

About 2 weeks ago I was told that the position I’m here for – the position I’ve been waiting for – is opening up. That conversation happened on a Wednesday. By Saturday, I had realized I don’t want it anymore. See link on restlessness and running my course and being tired – oh, so tired – of the politics in my work. And, if I’m not in Seattle for my job, Why am I here?

So…while I haven’t given notice, I’ve given intention of notice. I’m openly looking for jobs back in Minnesota, where I can tap into networks that I know, and work toward something that combines two of the things that drive me – intercultural relations and political campaigns.

Specialize much? I know.

Pathologically stupid time to be looking to switch careers? I know.

Regardless, it feels right and once again, I’m excited about working toward something. It’s also really sweet that people here are disappointed that I’m skipping town. Awww. [insert Sally Fields moment here]

Again with the change, I’m also batting around ideas about what to do with this space. Maybe a facelift will be enough to remedy my displeasure with The Blog, but… I’m trying to figure out how to more fully engage with fandom online and I can’t see how to do that outside of LiveJournal. Fandom lives, eats, sleeps, breathes in LiveJournal. There’s a bit of a defection going on to Dreamwidth, but the vast majority of the action is still on LJ and seems like it will be for some time to come.

But I don’t wanna support LiveJournal. LiveJournal goes down. LiveJournal limits content. Everybody hates LiveJournal. LiveJournal users hate LiveJournal. Dreamwidth is better and it’s dumb to get on LiveJournal now when there’s a better option…that no one is using yet.

If anyone has any brilliant suggestions on combating that whine, I’m all for it. That said, I think that the OpenID feature in LJ sucks (hard) and it restricts functionality / access to comms, which defeats my purpose of participating more actively. I also can’t really see myself maintaining two spaces in the blogosphere. Hell, I wouldn’t even say this one is maintained. [pouts about the perpetual lack of funds to repair the laptop]

Did I just talk myself into switching from WordPress to LiveJournal? [sigh]

Plus – LiveJournal has that cheesy little feature where you can easily cite a song with every post. So then I wouldn’t have to tell you that the title of this post comes from Rufus Wainwright’s I Don’t Know What It Is, which is just so very much where I am at this point.

At the core of all of this, is more fully integrating who I am.

I’ve run away from my insane love of political campaigns for far too long. Really. I am the girl who took 3 weeks off from work to go back to Minnesota to volunteer full time with the Obama campaign; the girl who has volunteered in every election since 2000 (except 2007 because I was in DC and there weren’t any); the girl who spent the months leading up to the 2004 election working from 9-5 and then volunteering from 5-9 or 10 or 11 or midnight; the girl who made her sister schedule her wedding ceremony around the 2006 election. I thrive on campaigns, twisted as that may seem to the majority.

I’ve also run away from fandom for most of my life and I’m finally to a place where I’m (mostly) over the stigma of being a fangirl and the judgment that comes with that. (Why do you care what I like? Sounds like a personal problem to me.)

Change, change, change… It’s good. And I’m ridiculously – OMG so – excited about my (short) long-term plans. I just need to get back home to Minnesota so I can harass work with the people that I know who can help me make it happen.

~~~~Sends out job-attracting vibes to the Twin Cities~~~~
~~~~you love me St. Paul…you always have~~~~



  1. Did I just talk myself into switching from WordPress to LiveJournal? [sigh]

    Heh. No comment. :)

  2. :P But I don’t wanna!

    I have this really visceral aversion to using LJ but… I just don’t see another good option. :(

  3. Hey, I have a visceral aversion to LJ too, but you know I’ve considered it on numerous occasions. I think the issue is user saturation (mental pictures). Dreamwidth might be better, but how many people are using it?

    On another note – I’m assuming the title of this post is a reference to a song I don’t know. Meanwhile, I have the theme from “Three’s Company” stuck in my head.

  4. First, if you don’t know Rufus’ “I Don’t Know What It Is,” you need to look it up. Fabulous song. :-)

    And yeah…I need to just get over my LJ aversion. *sigh* I just automatically relate LJ to angst, Angst and OMG MOAR ANGST. It is where a lot of my people are though…I should join them. :-)

    OMG, I just realized…some part of your subconscious brain must have heard this song because the next line that follows “so I knock on the door” is “take a step that is new”…which is ALSO a line in the “Three’s Company” theme song.


    Oh, or maybe it’s the line “Come and knock on our door?” And that similarity?


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